If you never discover your true self, you’ll always live as a mere portrayal of others judgment.
It’s very easy to get lost in a world where you’re constantly judged and labeled for every step you take and every move you make.
“If you continue to define yourself by what others say about of you, you’ll forget the sound of your own voice.”
It’s very important to find yourself before looking for anything else. Here’s how :
1. Figure out what it really means
It is very important to know what you are doing and why before you start doing anything if you want to succeed.
“By finding yourself, I mean reaching out to your inner self, uncovering the layers of societal expectations, scrapping off the image that others portray of you and finding the real treasure buried within your soul.”
To know more about the real meaning and importance of finding yourself, check out my post – WHO ARE YOU? (If you haven’t already!)
2. Make a list of the things that make you happy
Make a list of the things that make you happy, feel good about yourself, help you relax or just things that you love doing. It can include anything from dancing to painting, yoga or hanging out with your friends. Don’t feel ashamed of liking anything. This is not some form that needs to get societal approval. This is about you, figuring yourself out. There is always a reason why you like or dislike something. You are free to like anything (as long as it’s not illegal, harmful, insulting or pain inflicting)
3. Find your ‘why’
As I mentioned earlier, there’s always a reason you like/dislike something. Maybe you like doing yoga because it calms you down or you like to write because it helps you express yourself or you like hanging out with someone because they make you feel good about yourself. Find that why – knowing your why gives further clarity and serves as a motivation.
4. Block the outer noise to hear the inner voice.
Often, we make important decisions under parental or peer pressure like choosing a study stream or leaving behind our passion to pursue a corporate job that we absolutely hate but have to do anyway to earn a livelihood. We are scared to explore the unknown, so we tend to blindly follow the designated path and join the rat race. But if you really want to find your purpose or your calling, you need to “block the outer noise to hear the inner voice”.
5. Try new things
If you are unable to find your passion, try new things. Try a new sport, meet new people, explore different places, take up a new course. The more you explore, the higher are the chances that you’ll find something that you love. Keep exploring till you find something that you wouldn’t mind doing for the rest of your life. Life is too short and there are too many places to explore.
“You’re not a tree, move.”
6. Connect with yourself
To figure out yourself, you need to first connect with yourself. There are many ways to do that. Meditation is one of the best ways to silence the noise in your head and listen to the soul. You can also try journaling or morning pages. I’ll get into more detail if you want in another post.
7. Be mindful
Every day since we wake up, most of the time our body runs on autopilot, following the same routines, eating similar food, doing the same work, i.e. we work on autopilot. STOP! Think, pause, and reflect. Think about what are you doing and why. Be present in the moment, be mindful. Take the time to really feel your emotions, admire the beauty around, taste the food, and hear the sounds instead of being lost in your thoughts while working on autopilot mode. This will allow you to really understand how to you react to circumstances and what triggers particular emotions within you.
8. Do something creative
Spend some time every day doing something creative – draw, paint, sing, dance, write, do whatever works best for you but find a way to creatively express your innermost feelings. Not only will it clear your mind, it might turn out to be an artistic masterpiece!
9. What would I do if money and time were not a problem?
Try to answer this question as honestly as you can. Don’t drown your dreams under the burden of parent’s or financial expectation. What would you do if you never had to earn money or if you have all the time in the world? What do you do when no one is watching? What does your heart say when there is no other voice to suppress it? Listen to it. Do it. That’s your calling.
Ikigai is Japanese term that means a reason for being (the purpose of life ).
Don’t try to rush the process; it’s not something that happens overnight. It takes time, effort, patience and most importantly, courage to accept what you find and the determination to change for the better!
– The Luna